a little update.

If only you could have a peak into my brain.

You would see why it is virtually impossible for me to put in writing all of the thoughts swirling around in there!  It's really ridiculous and a constant struggle to reel all of them in and make them obedient to Christ.

I have wanted to blog a little bit but, frankly, haven't felt emotionally stable enough to feel like I could give an accurate "report" of how the Skips Great Adventure has been going......  ;)

For months, every day was a different day.  Some days I was on top of the world, other days way down low not sure how we were going to make it, and the other days floating somewhere in between.  And I am not just talking about life with Levi...there has been lots of other hard stuff going on....lots of arrow flying at us from the enemy.  It's been a really hard season.

"Cheerful as we may be, we must at intervals be cast down.  The strong are not always vigorous, the wise not always ready, the brave not always courageous, and the joyous not always happy."  Charles Spurgeon

I know the exact day that it all finally took a turn for the better because it was in my devotional, Jesus Calling, dated  February 23.  This is how the devotional for that day began; "Be on guard against the pit of self-pity.  When you are weary or unwell, this demonic trap is the greatest danger you face.  Don't even go near the edge of the pit.  Its edges crumble easily, and before you know it, you are on the way down."  AGGGHHHH!, "OH NO!", I screamed in my soul!, "This is ME!"  yuck yuck yuck!  In that moment the Lord graciously and firmly spoke to my heart and revealed my ugly sin.  Self-pity.  Ick.  Still makes me cringe to think about it.  

Anyway, since then, things have been better.  The circumstances haven't changed a bit.  But, my eyes are once again fixed on Jesus.  And THAT makes ALL the difference.

Sweet Levi still hasn't said a word.  This coming week we are going to let all of his therapists know that we need a break.....probably a 6 month break is what we are going to tell them.  They are all so sweet and I will miss them personally but the therapy just hasn't been helping at all.  We have almost been home 7 months and there have been very few and small changes.  Levi is still a mystery and very complex.  And we are at a place where that is okay.  We feel that we just need a rest from all of the "intervention" out there and move into a time of steadfast prayer over and for him.  I have a strong sense still that the Lord WILL BE glorified through Levi's life and I am kinda sick at the moment of trying to make him be what everyone else wants him to be.

He is the Lord's.  He is the Lord's.

Had a cool conversation with the other 4 kids this week.  I asked them all for their honest thoughts of "life with Levi".  It was very very sweet and honest.  "Mom, it has been really hard, but I am glad we did it."  "He has the smile of an angel."  "I am glad he is my brother."  "I think he really likes us."   "He's the best."  "I love him so much."

I am overwhelmed with the awesomeness and goodness of God.

Following the Lord truly is the greatest adventure!

The LORD's unfailing love surrounds the man who trusts in Him.

Psalm 32:10