Education for ME!!!!

 This weekend I am being given an incredible gift.  A friend of mine is taking me to this class in Portland.  I have heard ALOT talked about in the adoption community about grief and attachment issues amongst adopted kids, but I have never went to the extent of educating myself extensively on the topics.  I always felt like I would just cross that bridge when I came to it.  And now, thinking about bringing home our son this year, who will be almost 3 (if not 3 already), I am anticipating having many more "attachment" challenges with him than we had with Meili.  And frankly, even with Meili, I find myself from time to time wondering if some of her characteristics are "attachment" related????  I am so excited to get some formal education on this topic!  And I am soooo thankful to my friend for giving me this gift!!!!!!!!

Here is what they say the class is about:

This four-hour workshop will provide you with:

• An understanding of the critical role that attachment plays in children’s development
• An opportunity to reflect on your own attachment style and how this may impact your attachment with your child
• An overview of attachment styles, unique attachment issues in adoptive families, signs of an attachment problem, and effective strategies for repairing attachment problems
• Opportunities to practice techniques that you can go home and use with your child. These techniques are designed to address attachment concerns, trauma symptoms, and problems with emotional regulation
• Support from other parents facing similar challenges

Presenter: Ally Burr-Harris, Ph.D., is a licensed clinical psychologist at Children’s Program in Portland, Oregon. She specializes in the treatment of trauma, grief, attachment, and adoption-related issues. Ally is also a parent by birth and adoption. Two of her children were adopted transracially. Ally has served on the Adoption Mosaic board. Previously, Ally was the director of a federally funded child trauma program and an active participant in the National Child Traumatic Stress Network. She brings a wealth of both personal and professional experience to the workshop.

Alea

What a treat we got this week by having sweet Alea over to play.  She is the newly adopted daughter of my friend, Sondra.  She is ten years old, just like Jorie.  I cannot imagine what goes through the mind of a ten year old who has lived their entire life in an orphanage in China and then suddenly one day moves across the ocean, in with a family.  What I do know is this:  she is smart and fun to be with and I really like having her around.  I also really like watching Jorie interact with her.  This was one of the many highlights of our week!

With all the happenings in our lives and hearts right now, don't think for a second that I have forgotten my Chinese baby that is waiting for his momma to come and get him over in China.

In the midst of our "life" this week, we received in the mail the document that we have been waiting for 3 months for.  It was from the US Gov't's Dept. of Homeland Security and contained the one sentence that we needed to receive in order to continue on this LONG adoption journey:

"You have been approved to adopt one child from the following Convention country:  China"

Well, thank you very much United States government.  I am not sure why the heck it takes you three months to figure that out but nevertheless, thank you.  And now our attention has quickly turned to the Chinese government.  Yesterday we sent via Fed Ex this last document to the Chinese Consulate in San Francisco.  It will take them 2 weeks (hopefully) to authenticate this document and send it back to us.  Once they return it to us we will finally have our dossier complete and ready to send to China.  Then, we will have another 3 months wait for the Chinese government to read through every detail of our lives (awesome.) and determine if they deem us fit to adopt. 

And that is where we are at in this second journey of adoption.

So, if you wonder what I am doing with my spare time in the next 2 weeks.  I am probably on-line checking Fedex.com to track my paperwork to see where it is.  I am just a little bit obsessed.  FYI:  it is currently in San Francisco waiting for delivery to the Consulate on Monday morning. 

Come on, baby.  Let's keep this thing moving!  I need to love on my baby boy!

Apartment Ministry

We have a blog for our "apartment ministry" (for lack of a much better name) and here is the link if you want to see a few pictures. 

 http://outwardinkeizer.blogspot.com/

There is not a bunch on there, just a few things.  We have found it VERY hard to put into writing all that is transpiring both in our hearts and in our relationships there.  For whatever it's worth, here's the link.

learning to read!

 Last summer we went back and forth about whether or not to send Caleb to Kindergarten.

The only reason to send him was because I was incredibly fearful of teaching him to read.

The older two kiddos learned how to read from their fantastic kindergarten teacher and I was convinced that I wasn't capable of teaching someone to read.

Then I recognized that decision would be totally fear based and how could I send him away while all the rest of us were having a blast at home together.  And in the end, he tearfully begged me to let him stay at home with the rest of us.

And so, I prayerfully picked a reading curriculum and we began with lesson one.

Some lessons were fast and fun.

Others were painfully slow and filled with tears.

And finally last week....we finished lesson 100.

It is with GREAT JOY that I can now announce that Mr. Caleb knows how to read!

And let me tell you.....watching your kid smile for the first time....or take his first steps....has NOTHING on watching your kid learn to read!    Being a part of that adventure with him, watching God teach him, watching him learn to seek the Lord for help when he was struggling.....

oh wow....and to think I almost missed this experience.

GOD IS GOOD!

the fatherless

The conversations we get to have with the kids at the apartments blow my mind, break my heart, keep me up at night, and make my head spin.  This week a precious little 8 year old girl said to me,

"My dad said he didn't want me.  He said I wasn't his.  He's in jail.  But I AM HIS!"
And then her older sister piped in,
"Yeah, she's right.  He always said that she wasn't his.  But then last month he had to take a blood test and it proved that he is her dad."
And then the 8 year old said,
"Yeah, he's my dad.  I knew it.  Hmmmm....he's my dad.  But, he's in jail."

Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless.

Psalm 82:3

My 5th Pillar

 pil·lar/ˈpilər/

Noun:

A tall vertical structure of stone, wood, or metal, used as a support for a building, or as an ornament or monument.

I haven't written in a while...not because I don't have anything on my mind....but quite the opposite.  God is blowing my mind and opening my world up in a way that has never happened before.  And I haven't been able to quite get my brain around it enough to put it into written words........

There are 3 main "things" in life that, as I look back, I see how God used to impact and shape me the most.  And they are:
1.  my parentals
2.  two summer long mission trips to Europe and Asia
3.  Bible Study Fellowship
4.  Adopting Meili

I see these things as the pillars of my life that God has given me.  He taught me soooooo much through each of these experiences and revealed Himself in ways that forever changed me. 

And now God is putting into place the 5th pillar in my life.

In short, God, in His complete awesomeness, called and led my small group from church to follow Him to be in relationship with the tenants at an apartment building in my city.  This is not just any apartment building....it is where the lowest (with the exception of the homeless community) in socio-economic status, in my city, live.  The apartment building has 200 units.  If you googled this apartment building, you would see the following results: reports on gangs, violence, domestic abuse, drugs, police, police, police, shootings, etc.

All last year God spent leading us to serve Him at this apartment building.  And then in November, just 2 short months ago, a member of our group, my awesome friend Becky, moved into this scary place.  Let's be real, it's scary.  And what God has done in the last 2 months is completely freaking incredible.  Marc and I and my kiddos spend quite a bit of time every week there at the apartments and/or with the apartment people.  In just 2 months God has begun to open our eyes to the culture of people who live in American Poverty.  And, most importantly perhaps, we are falling in love with these people. 

It all really doesn't make any worldly sense.  And what is happening in our hearts is happening so fast.  It's all I can do to TRY to process all of this with my own kids......

Our small group deserves no glory.  Marc and I, nor any individual, deserves any glory.  But God....oh God, HE is totally deserving of all glory as He is reaching down into a very poor community and is in the process of revealing Himself to some very very special people....who have experienced some very very hard things in life. 

And we get to watch and have a front row seat to watch Him do His thing.  It is INCREDIBLE.

Not to mention that God's word is coming more alive to us than EVER before.....These are the 4 passages that are closest to my heart right now and that I am experiencing in a very real way:

Isaiah 1

Seek justice,

encourage the oppressed.

Defend the cause of the fatherless,

plead the case of the widow.

2 Corinth 4:5

For we do not preach ourselves, 

but Jesus Christ as Lord, 

and ourselves as your servants for Jesus' sake.

1 Thes 2:8

We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us.

Matthew 4:19...and all over Scripture....

"Come, follow Me." ~Jesus